{"id":100,"date":"2006-09-15T15:05:57","date_gmt":"2006-09-15T15:05:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/rickremender.com\/?p=100"},"modified":"2012-08-15T15:14:10","modified_gmt":"2012-08-15T15:14:10","slug":"hello-nerd","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/rickremender.com\/?p=100","title":{"rendered":"Hello, Nerd"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Welcome to my new website.<\/p>\n<p>My new website loves you unconditionally. When you sit in that lazy-boy recliner of yours cooking cocktail wieners in the easy-bake oven you stole from that yard sale and you catch a glimpse of yourself in the sliding glass door that leads to your &#8220;hobo grave yard&#8221; and you wonder how you became such an ugly and horrible person&#8211; don&#8217;t sweat it too much, my website still loves you.<\/p>\n<p>My new website will always be here for you no matter what.<\/p>\n<p>Go ahead, let yourself slide. Get as fat as you want. Forget to shower for a month. Brush your teeth with country gravy. Be the putrid sack of shit you&#8217;ve always dreamed of becoming&#8211; my website doesn&#8217;t mind. It&#8217;ll still party on you till the break-a-break-a dawn.<\/p>\n<p>Grow a weak little mustache and change your name to Renaldo Rumtugger Mclongtooth the III&#8211; do it, see if my new site gives two shits.<\/p>\n<p>It doesn&#8217;t.<\/p>\n<p>It loves you for who you are and what you will one day become.<\/p>\n<p>Welcome home.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Welcome to my new website. My new website loves you unconditionally. When you sit in that lazy-boy recliner of yours cooking cocktail wieners in the easy-bake oven you stole from that yard sale and you catch a glimpse of yourself &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/rickremender.com\/?p=100\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-100","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/rickremender.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/100"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/rickremender.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/rickremender.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/rickremender.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/rickremender.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=100"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/rickremender.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/100\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":103,"href":"https:\/\/rickremender.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/100\/revisions\/103"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/rickremender.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=100"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/rickremender.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=100"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/rickremender.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=100"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}